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By Phil, January 15, 2010 12:19 pm

Reading time: 2 minutes 48 seconds

The next in the series on finding your focus – click here to subscribe and never miss another post.

Oprah Winfrey is one of most focussed people on plant.  From humble origins she has built a one woman media machine.  Over the last 25 years she has logged over 4,000 hours of the Oprah Show, speaking to audiences in over 100 countries.  Her empire includes a magazine, book club and one of the world’s most popular websites.  Oprah is the only person to have appeared on every Time Magazine list of the 100 most influential people in the world every year since its inception.  When Oprah speaks, the world listens.

So how does Oprah stay so focussed.  Here are 4 of her secrets:

1) Be Authentic – Find your Vocation

“The Biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams”

Oprah walks her truth.  Her personal drive comes from the feeling that she was put on earth for a purpose.  We all have a unique set of skills, strengths and abilities and personal values to serve.  Finding a vocation – what you were put on earth to do – creates massive personal focus.  Think about what you were put on earth to do – it needn’t be as grand an ambition as Oprah, Gandhi or Martin Luther King – perhaps it is to be a great parent, to care for others in your community, or to design a new technology to help mankind.  If you can find your purpose, you’ll feel the urge to use every second on earth to achieve this.

2) Work Smarter – be more effective than everyone else

“The Big Secret in life is there is no Big Secret.  Whatever your goal, you can get there if you are willing to work”

Oprah is renowned as one of the hardest working people on the planet – she never stops.  Yet her secret is that she has learned to work effectively – to put her energy and attention into the most important activities and let the less important things go.  Learning to work smarter is a key way to find more personal focus – it will free up energy and help you feel more fulfilled.  Later in this series, I’ll share some key ideas on how to work smarter and be more effective.

3) Never give up – don’t let them drag you down

“We are each responsible for our own lives – no other person is or even can be”

Oprah could have given up before she even started.  What are the odds of a girl born into poverty in rural Mississippi to a teenage mother becoming one of the most influential people on the planet.  Early in her career many media insiders were scathing of her rise, Time Magazine writing “In a field dominated by white males, she is a black female of ample bulk. As interviewers go, she is no match for, say, Phil Donahue.”  Her secret is the ability to live in the moment and to face triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters the same.  Oprah doesn’t’ operate in a rose-tinted wonderland where everything is wonderful.  She takes a realistic, pragmatic approach to success and failure.  She looks for the learning in every success – how to be better next time.   Think about how you can cultivate a realistic determination to achieve your vocation.

4) Help others – Follow a Higher Calling

“What I know for sure is that what you give comes back to you”

Oprah is a woman on a mission.  Everything she does is designed to help other people to make the most of their lives.  By putting the welfare of others above that of herself, she has selected a motivation beyond serving her own ego and needs.  Finding a motivation that goes beyond ourself is powerful way to increase our focus.  When others are depending on our actions, it is harder to find an excuse or wimp out of helping.  To increase your focus, consider the motivation behind your actions and look for opportunities to serve the greater good where possible.

Of course, there is only one Oprah.  Finding your focus is a very personal process, yet we can learn from her example.  One way to this is to try modelling Oprah.  Pick a day, think about the focus needed to achieve what she has and then try being her for the day.  Concentrate on acting authentically, being as effective and focussed on your priorities as possible, being indomitable and genuinely helping others.  What did it feel like to be Oprah for the day?  Please leave a comment and let everyone in the Less Ordinary community know.

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By Phil, November 26, 2009 1:19 pm

Reading Time: 1 minute and 47 seconds

Today is Thanksgiving in the United States.  This is a day devoted to gratitude.  Thanksgiving’s origins are from the original settlers setting aside time to be thankful for the harvest and having food to survive the harsh winter.  In the modern world, it has become a time to be with the people we love and to be grateful for all we have in our lives.  In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I wanted to share an amazing story of one man’s experience of struggle and gratitude.

In 1983, Rom Houben was driving home when his car was caught up in a huge accident.  He nearly died that day, yet somehow he survived in a coma.  Doctors ran every test they knew and found no response to any stimulus – Rom was diagnosed in a total vegetative state, and for 23 years he remained in hospital, motionless.

In 2006, Dr. Steven Laureys, an experimental neurobiologist was working on a project to better understand long-term coma patients.  Laureys decided to run new tests on patients to monitor their brain activity.  When Laureys ran his tests on Rom, he saw something remarkable – normal, healthy brain activity.  Everyone had assumed that because Rom’s body had stopped moving, his brain had shut down too.  Laureys realised that inside his still body, Rom’s brain was very much alive.

For 23 years, Rom was a prisoner in his own body.  He could see everything that was going on, hear the conversations of the nurses, smell the food on the next patients table and do nothing.  Rom heard about the death of his father from his distraught mother and was powerless to respond.

Laureys used intensive physiotherapy to help Rom break his silence using a voice machine operated by slight movements of one finger.  Rom was free.  So how does Rom explain his ordeal?

When the doctors first pronounced his coma, Rom “screamed, but there was nothing to hear”.  In the first few weeks and months, Rom felt “powerlessness. Utter powerlessness. At first I was angry, then I learned to live with it.”  Miraculously he learned to cope through intense periods of mediation, “I travelled with my thoughts into the past, or into another existence altogether”. Sometimes, “I was only my consciousness and nothing else”.

And after 23 years of being trapped, how did he feel when Laureys finally made his discovery?  “I’ll never forget the day that they discovered me,” he said. “It was my second birth”.  Rom had no anger or bitterness over his experience, only gratitude at a new chance at life.  His remarkable attitude shows the power of gratitude.  This story had helped me to reflect on my experience and feel immense gratitude for the countless blessings in my life.

Wherever you are in the world, I hope that you can take a moment today to think about your life and be grateful for your experience, and the world around you.  Happy Thanksgiving.

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By Phil, June 24, 2009 11:28 am

Sir Ranulph Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes, OBE is the world’s greatest living adventurer according to the Guinness Book of Records.  Fiennes has visited both Poles on foot, circumnavigated the globe, run seven marathons on seven continents in seven days (at the age of 61), and this year climbed Mount Everest at the age of 65.  He continues to find and achieve the extraordinary despite undergoing heart bypass surgery five years ago and having lost the ends of several fingers to frostbite (legend has it he amputated the ends himself in his shed with an electric saw).  So what are the secrets of this extraordinary adventurer?

 1.     Have a vision

Fiennes is a visionary.  He conceives astounding feats and then sets his mind to achieving them.  He has built a life and career doing the extraordinary.  Fiennes does not limit his thinking or ambition and truly believes everything is possible.  Once a vision is fully formed, he starts finding a way to make it happen.

 2.     Plan carefully

Prince Charles has sponsored several of his expeditions and described his circumnavigation of the globe as “a mad and suitably British enterprise.”  Fiennes disagrees and outlines the importance of meticulous planning, preparation and practice, adding ”These expeditions are very carefully planned and entirely feasible. Now if you were talking about, I don’t know, hopping to the south pole on a pogo stick – that would be mad. But not what I do.”

Fiennes devotes enormous amounts of time working on his mental attitude and developing his physical abilities to allow him to successfully achieve the extraordinary.  He gets the very best support teams and equipment to give him the best chance of success.  His planning is second to none in the world of exploring.

 3.     Face your Fears

Fiennes had never undertaken mountaineering until his late 50s due to vertigo and “a morbid fear of heights”.  During his life he has faced many of our most common fears head on: fear of failure, fear of isolation, fear of death.  His example in climbing the world’s highest mountain shows what is possible when you don’t let your fears hold you back from taking on new challenges and extending your comfort zone.

 4.     Keep on Trudging

During his recent Everest expedition Fiennes was asked what kept him going.  He simply replied “I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and trudging forward, thinking that there is no end point to the journey”.  Fiennes’ fierce determination comes from living in the moment rather than fixating on the end goal.

 5.     Never Give Up

Fiennes had two aborted attempts at Everest before finally conquering the peak.  In 2005 on his second attempt, Fiennes suffered a minor heart attack during his ascent.  He refused to see these attempts as failure and spoke of his “bull-headed determination” being key to finally completing a successful attempt.

 6.     Inspire others

Fiennes expeditions are all designed to support charitable organisations.  He pushes himself to help others less fortunate than himself, raising millions for good causes.  Fiennes is also a highly-sought after motivational speaker and shares his experiences with thousands of people every year.  Fiennes achievements are bigger than his own personal glory and this drives him to push on where others might give up.

So what can you learn from Sir Ranulph Twistleton-Wykeham-Fiennes, OBE?

• Create your vision – what is your next extraordinary project or achievement?  Don’t box yourself in or limit your ambition.
• Plan carefully – take the time to prepare properly – what skills do you need to develop, who can support you, what are your specific goals?
• Face your fears – what thoughts and fears might stop you?  How can you overcome them?  The right mental attitude is essential to increase your chances of success.
• Keep on Trudging – Stay in the present and focus on the next step rather than fixating on the end point.  Give each small step your full focus.
• Never give up – an unsuccessful attempt is not a failure.  Take time to work out what you learnt and what you’ll do differently next time.
• Inspire others – share your vision and achievements with others and inspire them to do the extraordinary.